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Dear friend,

You were made for abundant life!

I’m Phylicia, and welcome to Driven Women! I believe in abundant life, practically. In singleness or marriage, work or home, we can live as overcomers in Christ. Join me in learning how to apply God’s Word and preach the gospel with your life.

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Featured Article

Soulmates, the Pence Rule, and Brothers in Christ

This episode started, as many others do, with a Voxer conversation about soulmates. Do we have soulmates or are we free to marry any available believer? How are we supposed to relate to the opposite sex?

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Hope is the antidote to turmoil. “Why this turmoil within me?” The Psalmist says. “Put your hope in God, for I will STILL praise Him.” For the Christian, turmoil may be a fact we face, a struggle that meets us, but it 👏🏼 is 👏🏼 not 👏🏼an 👏🏼 identity 👏🏼 You cannot overcome what you believe innate to yourself. You cannot live in victory if you accept defeat.

And victory? It’s made up of both wins and losses. Losses, because the righteous fall seven times and rise again.

This is not popular to say but I’m saying it because it’s in Scripture: God has not changed. His hope and presence are the antidote to anxiety. Doesn’t mean you won’t struggle. Doesn’t mean it won’t be a fight. But it’s the GOOD fight, and choosing to put hope in God is an act of the will from a standpoint of faith. “I believe I will see the goodness of God in the land of the living.” Not after death. Here. Today.

My friend @brantcole preached a sermon that stuck with me - he pointed out that salvation is unconditional, but most of God’s promises are conditional. You obey, trust, walk with Me? I will bless you! I will bring peace!

And it’s true. But because we avoid this clear truth about how God works we linger in apathy & inaction. We don’t do the things God says will bring peace, then wonder why we aren’t peaceful.

It’s a fight for me daily, but I know it to be a good and holy fight, and I for one refuse to turn over and let the enemy have his way. This is the day we choose hope. This is the day He sends His faithfulness. This is the day we praise Him until we believe the truth we preach to ourselves. Because God hasn’t changed.

Read: Psalm 42

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Six funny things people believe about me that aren’t true:
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👉🏻 I’m Southern Baptist. Or Catholic. Or Pentecostal. PCA. Methodist. You name the denomination, someone has tried to say I’m in it 😂 Truth be told I’ve spent time in or been a member of about 7 different denominations over the course of my life, and even spent time in a home church. I am actually nondenominational, but I see value in most denominations and what they offer the kingdom. I teach church history with the goal of unity, so I see positives from most factions of Christianity!
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👉🏻 I’m extremely “organized”. While I am a minimalist and am very productive... I am not organized. Never open my cupboards or the closet in my office. 😬
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👉🏻 I’m 38. This haircut probably aged me a few years (I still love it!) and I’m kind of a granny at heart but - I am actually 29 ❤️
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👉🏻 I’m anti-tattoo. Every few weeks I get a message from a follower with questions about Leviticus 18, little to know I actually *have* a tattoo (bonus fact: Josh & I got tattoos in Las Vegas on our anniversary return trip - we went there on our honeymoon too, but went horseback riding not tattoo-ing).
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👉🏻 I study my bible every day for an hour in a room stacked with leather bound books 😛 I actually study 3-5 days a week, and make a distinction between personal time with God and the research I do for articles, Insta, and books. A lot of times my girls are there while I do it.
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👉🏻 I’m either six feet tall or 5’4”. I’m actually 5’6” but wear heels so much everyone thinks I’m taller. @chels_catzinthekitchen makes me look like an Amazon 😂 (Bonus: One funny thing we all believe about Chels - she’s perpetually 21 and has found the fountain of youth 😂Follow her for some awesome recipes & great thoughts on marriage & parenting)
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I’m curious - what surprised you most?👇🏼 PC: @nataliepuls

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If your kids are an inconvenience to your “leadership”, it’s probably time to recalibrate your priorities.
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As a work from home mom with a business and ministry, I have to daily check my heart toward my children. I love my work. But do I love it more than my kids?
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For you the question may be - do I love my volunteering more than my kids? Do I love my church more than my kids? My Instagram? My reputation?
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We live in an age where children are the thing that ends your life and freedom - that place you land after you did all the cool stuff. They’re treated like dogs, pets we acquire when we are good & ready. And because of the messed up narratives around motherhood (celebrate failure! Never wear pants again! Also, the entire weight of parenting and home are up to you!) it’s no wonder people view children this way.
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Christians can stop this, at least in our ranks, and it begins with each of us making the choice to put family first. Not in a child-centric way, but in the way God intended we do: Lead well in the home, and you’ll lead well outside of it.
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If my marriage, and secondly, my parenting, are on the rocks I want to invest more time in what comes easy to me (my work). But that’s the opposite of what I should do.
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Who we are at home is who we are.
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A good leader leads well at home first.

PC: @elladuranphoto

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Here’s what happens when we dumb down the cost of following Jesus. 🌱 we create fair-weather “followers”, not disciples who understand the cost
🌱 we create an approach to the Bible that is subjective and seeks personal application alone
🌱 we are dishonest about the suffering, sorrow, and difficulty that comes with walking in His steps
🌱 we make promises about the Christian life that Jesus never made. “Repent and believe” isn’t the kind of message coming with floodlights and fog machines, but it’s the turning around to follow, the picking up of our cross like Jesus did with His, that makes up the heart of Christian life.

Peter said it well - “do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.” (1 Peter 4:12-13)

Do not be surprised when trials come. They are coming. They come because they came to Him, because this world has a “restless evil”, and if we follow Him, we follow where we went.

The joy, peace, and love of God are not something we get apart from difficulty but WITHIN IT. If you feel cheated because Christianity isn’t what you were told it would be, chances are the “gospel” you heard wasn’t the real one. It is good news for us, presently and eternally, because we have Immanuel in the furnace. Not because we never faced the fire.

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There is such expectation in this season. Advent is a season of bated breath: We wait, eyes wide open, for the coming of our King. He has already come, but we relive the story every year, anticipating the day symbolic of when He was born.

It’s this kind of expectation - God is coming, He is on the move - that should color our prayers.

It breaks my heart, in one sense, how new the idea of specific & bold prayer is for many Christians. But it excites me also, because more and more believers are seeing that relationship with God means EXPECTATION and ANTICIPATION. That’s why Christianity is such an adventure! We follow the God who lives & moves & breathes. We follow the One who entered our world and became Immanuel... God With Us.

Advent is a time of expectancy, but don’t let this be the only time. Let this be all the time. Let this be the pattern of your days, the habit of your heart! When you expect Him to answer, when your faith grows beyond a distant belief in His existence to an actual belief in His character - all the world comes alive. Every day is a chance to see His hand.

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Fun fact: I never really learned to read a face clock. I wear watches for looks 🙈 and if you ask me the time, it will be five minutes past it by the time I can tell you 😂 my poor mom, she gave me so many face-clock worksheets and they just didn’t stick!
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I might be about the digital clock life but it doesn’t stop me from wearing pretty stuff 😛 This Black Friday I’m sharing some of my favorite items - journals, notebooks, beauty items, and my @mvmtforher watch. I’ve had lots of questions about my blue light glasses 👉🏻 also from @mvmt!
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Head to stories for the breakdown and an up close look, and - thanks to @mvmt for partnering with me - use my code PHYLICIAMASONHEIMER15 for 15% off 💕 linked in stories!

Let’s do our own #fridayintroductions- what’s one fun fact about YOU? 👇🏼

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Last Thanksgiving.
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Last Thanksgiving, I was just coming out of the worst autoimmune flare I’d had to date. It was the first time it got in my eyes, the first time of three I lay in a darkened room unable to open them more than a few seconds at a time.
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Last Thanksgiving, family pictures show the dark circles around my eyes, where tears constantly wept from the rawness.
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Last Thanksgiving I had just experienced complete weakness for the first time. My friends and nanny watched my children because I could not see to tend to them.
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It could have been my last thanks-giving. My time to say - forget this! I follow the Living God and all my body is experiencing is pain! What do I have to thank God for? If I had known what was to come - another year of this, capped by a broken leg & wheelchair for two months - could I have faced it? Could I have had the faith?
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When trials loom large, they threaten to overtake any goodness we still experience; any glimpses of God’s heart in the midst of suffering. And when we spend our time wondering if this will be forever, we rob ourselves of the strength for today. Our Father only gives grace for the next step, the next obedience. When we focus on the suffering, focus on the “why” and the “when” instead of “who” and “what”, we miss the point. We fail to see the surrounding.
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Instead of “why me?” I have learned to ask, “who are You to me, here?”
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Instead of “when will it be over?” I have learned to ask, “what good thing are You doing through this?”
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Ah, Lord! I would not ask for this. I ask for healing still. But I thank You for the empathy, the strength, the humbling, the purpose I have been taught through this pain. What has felt most like loss has been most truly gain. You are good & You do good. You are at work always, in me & for me, and for these people I steward. We thank You. We love you. We give you thanks.
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“But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” (1 Cor 15:57)

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#sponsored I have been waiting with bated breath to share this bible with you - because yes, this five book set is ONE BIBLE! This is scripture in its original, simplified form, uninterrupted by chapter and verse.
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The Bible - the Hebrew Scriptures and later NT epistles and gospels - was not originally divided into these handy sections. Archbishop Langston first divided the Bible into chapters (the Latin Vulgate was his text) in the 12th century, followed by Robertus Stephanus adding verses to the Greek NT in the 16th. While having these divisions makes it very easy to read and reference (much easier than scrolls!) it can cause us to lose sight of the larger story & account.
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The @christianstandardbible #CSBreadersset has a book for each of the literary types (how the Bible is already divided):
🌱 Pentateuch (Gen-Deut)
🌱 Historical (Josh-Esther)
🌱 Writings/Poetry (Job-Songs)
🌱 Prophets (Isaiah-Mal)
🌱 New Testament
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This is a great gift for the reader in your life! Study the Bible in its original literary form 😍 CSB is my own version of choice, a dynamic translation that combines word-for-word and phrase-for-phrase translation methods.
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@christianstandardbible is giving away one reader’s set to one of my peeps ❤️ to enter:
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Follow @christianstandardbible
Be following me
Comment what excites you most about this set! 👇🏼

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“When I joined Driven Women, I didn’t realize that many women were struggling with the same spiritual struggles I was experiencing on a daily basis. Phylicia really enlightened me and being part of her community has brought me closer to Jesus and my family!” -Tiffany H.

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