Dear Girl, Your Sinful Past Does Not Define Your Future

Christian Life & Theology

“I just didn’t think it was possible to stay pure after falling.” she said, fighting back tears.

As a girl who had previously obliterated my own purity, I wondered the same thing myself. I was a new Christian faced with the mistakes I had made and the consequences they brought to my doorstep. Could I truly say “no” if my next boyfriend wanted to have sex? Was it even possible to conquer the beast that is lust?

Here’s the biggie: Could I ever love God more than my sexual desires?


You see, the truth is, if we continue to sin sexually after regeneration, it reveals that we have elevated our sin to sit upon his throne as Lord of our life.

The enemy wants us to believe that a person who has sinned sexually will never be able to abstain before marriage. So why try? He wants you and I to remain enslaved to sexual sin.

But dear friend, you have been set free.

Sin Chasers

Before God saved me, I chased tirelessly after sin. Promiscuous was my middle name and I was addicted to male affection and attention. But God graciously snatched me from that destructive path, and gave me a new heart with new desires. (Ephesians 2:1-5).

As my mind shifted from things of this world to things of the Lord, his grace enabled me more and more to love his will for sex above my own. He opened my eyes to the fact that purity as a lifestyle was worth fighting for.

And it was a fight.

By God’s grace, I was able to walk down the aisle to meet my now husband who I had only kissed. 3 1/2 years before that day, I would have told you it wasn’t possible. But God is in the business of bringing about miraculous change in people.

Jesus makes us pure from the moment he saves us, but walking in purity in our relationships leading up to marriage is proof of newness in Christ.

He loves taking sin chasers and turning them into Jesus followers.

READ: How I Battled Lust as a Single Woman

Made New and Equipped

Jesus doesn’t just save us, he reshapes us. He continually proves his redemption in our lives day after day, as we work out our salvation before him by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12-13 ESV)

Whether it be in the secret spaces of the mind or by physically committing an act, every woman on the face of the earth has struggled with sexual sin to a point. Not one of us is exempt from the need of the purifying blood of Jesus.

For those of us who have sinned sexually outside of the confines of our mind, we are faced with more lingering consequences. Memories and awakened desires provide for temptation that presses hard upon our shoulders.

And this is why we must cling to Christ! Only through him can we withstand the darts of the evil one. (Ephesians 6:16).

We must stand firm as new creations, knowing that he has washed away all our sin, and then take up the armor he has provided for us. (2 Corinthians 5:17; Ephesians 6:10-18).

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints, (Ephesians 6:13-18 ESV)

He has equipped us with all we need to live in obedience to him–even in the area of sexual purity.

READ: You Have to Fight for Freedom From Sin

Free to Walk in Purity

Sweet friend, if you are in Christ, your chains have been broken. He has freed you to walk in purity before him. You are no longer a slave to sin! What beautiful news!

We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. (Romans 6:6-7 ESV)

When we continue to walk down the path of darkness, guided by our flesh, we will sacrifice our very lives on the alter of sin. As the Israelites begged for slavery in Egypt while walking in the wilderness, we present our wrists to sin and beg to be slaves again.

Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. (Romans 6:12-13 ESV)

So my question for you is this: do you want to be free? Do you want to walk in obedience to God?

Jesus has freed you from the bondage of sexual sin, he has equipped you for the battle, but you must want that freedom. You must choose whether or not you will serve sin or God. Will you embrace the beauty of his will for sex?

Because even if you have a past filled with impurity, your future can stand in stark contrast to it. You can learn to walk by the Spirit, refusing to gratify those desires of the flesh which seek to rule over you. (Galatians 5:16).

And you can start now. Remember, he has given you all you need. He goes before you, and his Spirit is inside you.

You are free to chase after Jesus and live a life of purity that points the world to him.

Brittany is a follower of Christ, wife to James and Momma to one in Heaven. She exists to bring God glory and prays her writing is an avenue for that. She longs to encourage women to think and live biblically and thrives on seeing women open up their hearts to The Savior and to other women around them. 

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