Since stress is a sense of “losing control”, the best way to reduce it is to bring life under control. Good habits are a means of bringing life under control without even thinking about it. However, planning must also bear a level of flexibility in order to avoid slipping into OCD. As with everything in life, a balance must be struck.
People say the first year of marriage is the hardest. I think the first year a child arrives is the hardest! Marriage was pretty simple when we were both working, got a reasonable amount of sleep each night, and weren’t captive to the feeding schedule of a tiny human. Our little girl is the light of our lives, totally worth those first six weeks (the primary period of “what-on-earth-is-happening”), but her arrival required some major adjustments to our relationship. Our marriage changed when Adeline was born; it changed in five distinct ways.
The gospel gives us the incredible privilege of joining God’s redemptive purpose. We are the living temples of God on this earth because of what Jesus accomplished. A temple of God should be filled with the Spirit of God –Â and nothing else.
Staying home after working an 8-5 for five, seven, or ten years is a transition. But contrary to theory, full-time work and full-time motherhood have much more in common than meets the eye. In fact, my seven years working a desk gave me an edge as I moved to full-time home management.Â
I recently finished the book Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No One Has the Time by Brigid Shulte and was so challenged by the research Brigid shared. The book questioned many of the norms of work and home – particularly the concepts of the “ideal worker” and the “ideal mother”. An ideal worker is the person who stays late, does more, answers emails after hours, and is invested in her job at the expense of all other priorities. The ideal mother is the woman many of us attempt to be because we think we should – spinning plates of work, home, parenthood and marriage all at once, by ourselves. Quite often, the ideal worker and ideal mother are combined into one completely overwhelming individual we measure ourselves against every day.
These days we move strategically, chess pieces navigating the game. We have to know if he’s ready to spiritually lead and financially take on a family. We have to know where it’s headed because otherwise, it’s a waste of time – right? Dating is supposed to lead to marriage – right?
Not always.
This week on Uniquely Woman,  Lisa and I discuss ways to step back and breathe, get perspective, and take charge of your emotions. We’ll discuss how to look up and ahead, cultivate gratitude, and pour out your heart to God – not vent to the nearest listening ear. Below are the show notes!
I’ve often thought the negative stereotype of moms as stressed out, overwhelmed, and run ragged with responsibility was a little unfair. It’s true that motherhood is exhausting at times, and the more kids you have the harder it is (as the oldest of six, I know what it looks like). But I don’t believe stress is God’s intention for our lives. I believe that even in motherhood, we can manage our time in a way that allows us to enjoy our children, enjoy our hobbies, and fully live the lives God has given us.
So with thought, prayer, trial and error, I developed my daily routine.
Too many single women get discouraged about motherhood before they even arrive there. Motherhood does not destroy your identity, nor does it take away from the life you lived as a single. Motherhood enriches your days, filling them with as many smiles and giggles as new tasks and responsibilities.