When Sorrows Like Sea Billows Roll
Unless we're close - down the street, in your life kind of close - all we can see of other's lives is what they show us. People assume that if someone doesn't dump their vulnerability onto the internet, they don't struggle or experience pain. There are all kinds of...
Anxious and Worried About Many Things
In the last week we attended a wedding and a baptism. We witnessed the unity of a young man and woman becoming a new family. And we witnessed the unity of six new believers joining the family of the church. Both baptism and marriage are sacraments, sometimes called “a...
He Will Be Faithful Again
We moved to Pennsylvania from Virginia when I was 37 weeks pregnant with Adeline. Some of you have heard this story - how Addie was born 5 days later in a previously unplanned home birth, with a sweet Mennonite midwife - the only practitioner who would take me so last...
Church Matters… But Why?
We seem to be hearing a cacophony of messages about the church. We hear that the church, the gathering of committed believers led by Christ, is important. It matters. We also hear devastating stories from within the church. Abuse and cover-ups, pride and favoritism,...
Do All the Good You Can
Each of us is in a corner of the world the other can't reach. I can't reach the people in a Georgia suburb like the people in the Georgia suburbs can. I can't reach the neighbor in southeast London like the people in southeast London can. You can't reach the people in...
The Cost of Real Community
Yesterday after our church's first service a group of families walked next door to the playground and, as our progeny swarmed the slides and swings, we talked about the cost of community. In the sermon this week, our pastors talked about the cost of Christian...
The Risk of Falling Back in Love
I want to be jealous. I look around at other couples and make up stories in my head – their life wasn’t as hard, their losses not so grievous, their betrayal not so deep. I think, we had it worse. But that’s a lie, because everyone born into this imperfect world is touched by that imperfection. We all carry hurts and we all pass through trials – some are just less visible than others. What we do in those trials, and who we become (the plural “we” of marriage) has the power to be a witness to this wasting world.
How do you avoid making someone a “project?”
Verity '22 Streaming AccessNow Available Introduction This November we were so excited to bring back the third annual Verity Conference located in Petoskey, Michigan. 250+ women came from all around the United States to join us in person, and over 200 women watched...
Live a Bold, Gracious Faith
I travel a lot as a Bible teacher. I've been to all kinds of conventions, conferences, and women's retreats. Usually the goal of these events is something along the lines of "encouragement in Christ" - which is a great goal, something I hope all women gain from gospel...
If You Don’t “Get” The Holy Spirit…
When I was a kid the Holy Spirit was that dispensable, confusing, and honestly, boring member of the Trinity who none of us really understood. God made sense. Jesus seemed nice. But the Spirit? We didn't know what to do with Him. When I look at church culture today,...
Together We Redeem Your Bloodline
A few weeks ago I talked about generational sin and the uphill battle many believers face to break the chains of their family line. I don't know why the Lord keeps laying this topic on my heart of late; perhaps because, as my kids get older, I see more clearly what my...
Answering Kids’ Theology Questions
Some of my best conversations with my five year old happen when I’m putting her to bed at night. When it’s time to sleep, her mind starts swirling with theological questions and conundrums. She’s a lot like me in that way. Some questions are easy to answer, like “Can...
Ours: Biblical Comfort for Men Grieving Miscarriage
For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death. A husband and wife can’t possibly imagine all that those words will entail when spoken during their marriage. Couples dream of having children, but...
Prayer is War
I write this to you tired. Physically, because we’ve had a taxing week of back-to-back speaking engagements for me, followed by a bout of sickness so severe it took me out for several days and currently has Josh down for the count. I am still struggling with the...
How Did Sabbath Become Sunday Worship?
In recent years there has been an increase in Instagram posts and resources encouraging Christians to revert from a Sunday celebration of worship to a Saturday Sabbath. Why is this? To answer this question we have to look at the history of Sabbath and how it transitioned to Sunday worship! The celebration of Christian community and the resurrection of Christ on Sunday has been a standard in the Christian church since the first century, but it’s important to know why the Christians diverged from the Jews on their day of meeting.
Five Views of Biblical Creation
We attach a lot of emotion to the topic of creation theories. Sometimes this is because it’s a view we were always raised with and questioning or challenging it feels like breaking apart faith itself. Remember: challenging our worldview doesn’t mean we necessarily walk away from our viewpoint. It forces us to be honest about what we believe and understand the questions skeptics are asking – even skeptics who are fellow Christians.
The Constant I Have is You
In other years I’ve written about why I chose you; how I worked through insecurity and fear; how we processed our independence; how we fought for our covenant; and last year, how our community made our marriage what it is today. All those things are still true and still in process.
Should Christian Women Watch Redeeming Love?
Two years ago I discussed on Instagram how Christian romance, but specifically the popular book Redeeming Love, have acted as a “gateway drug” to pornography and erotica in the lives of many young women. Testimonies flooded in from women who were recommend this book by older mentors, aunts, friends, and pastor’s wives. Now that the movie is coming out January 21st, I have moved the content of that Instagram talk to a podcast episode and blog post.
Honest Marriage Episode 12 // On Growth
As Josh and Phy wrap up their series on marriage, they conclude by discussing growth: how do we grow together practically and encourage one another to be diligent workers for the benefit of the covenant? There are practical things we can do along with the more fundamental actions of prayer and communication. In this episode, Josh and Phy discuss the practical things they do to stay on the same page, set goals together, and encourage growth in the areas in which they need it.
Honest Marriage Episode 11 // On Common Interests
When Josh and I started dating we didn’t have many things in common. We didn’t like the same music (and I liked concerts; Josh didn’t); we didn’t like the same books, games, or hobbies. We were drawn together instead by mutual values, which worked until we tried to decide what to do for fun! As time went on we discovered just how different we actually were (not just in hobbies, either – we are opposites on every single personality test, and have completely opposite rankings for our love languages, apology languages and more!).
Honest Marriage Episode 10 // On Friendships
How do we cultivate friendships as a married couple – both together and separately? In this episode of the Honest Marriage series Josh and Phy discuss the nuances and difficulties of friendship after marriage. Some friendships are for seasons, others are longterm. Making friends as adults can be hard, especially when you have to take into account your spouse’s preferences and opinions.
Honest Marriage Episode 9 // On Flirtation
In honor of the NEW book launched by Phylicia and her friend, Lisa Jacobson, this week Josh and Phy talk about FLIRTATION! Is it wrong? What happens when we’re told flirtation is wrong and then get married? How did Phylicia’s 30 day flirtation experiment on Josh turn into a book??
Honest Marriage Episode 8 // On Church
Marriage and family take place within the larger family of Christ’s church. Church is not just a building or a dutiful Sunday attendance; it is a community of faith and accountability, and for marrieds, a support system and place to serve. Churches are made up of imperfect people and are therefore imperfect institutions, but it is within our church family that our marriages have a place to thrive.
Honest Marriage Episode 7 // On Transitions
For years it seemed like Josh and I could not come up for air. During engagement, Josh struggled to find a job after college. The job he found was unpredictable and kept him on the road every day, sometimes away for a week or more at a time. Once we were married, not much changed. We found out we were pregnant on our first anniversary and from then on experienced a succession of job changes, losses, financial set backs, out of state moves, more babies, moving again, starting a business – it just didn’t end.